Parenting Is Like Folding a Fitted Sheet

snarkecard_fold fitted sheet

When I started this blog, I wanted it to be a place where I could make light of the heavy parts of parenting. Have a good laugh at it, you know? Maybe you’ve noticed lately that I haven’t posted much. To tell you the truth, I haven’t laughed much these days. You hear it all the damn time. PARENTING IS HARD . It’s such a simple statement that holds so much weight. When we say it, we’re not complaining as {Read More}

10 Reasons Moms Love Getting Their Hair “Did” More Than Sex

steelmagnolias_hair

Ladies – we love nothing more getting their our hair done, amirite? Honestly, if it came down to choosing between a spa day and two hours a the salon, I seriously would choose the latter. Not only do you look fab afterwards but it’s just so damn relaxing. Uninterrupted time with the latest issue of People? Uh, hell yes. I had an appointment last week and, as I sat there in my reverie, I realized that this is, indeed, better {Read More}

What People Don’t Tell You About Raising Sensitive Boys

Finn_dock Wisconsin

As parents of boys, we are often conditioned to think that our kids should have a thick skin. “Toughen up,” we say. “Don’t be a baby.” We have more tolerance for tears when they come from girls, as it’s just the way we’ve become accustomed to think. No one tells you what to do when you have a sensitive boy and, the more I talk to other moms of boys, the more I realize that there are plenty out there. {Read More}

Bachelor In Paradise Penultimate Episode: Stupidity Runs Rampant

I've got this.

It’s hard to look for a theme on BIP each week other than blatant debauchery and ridonkulous drama but this week’s theme bitch-slapped me silly. It’s become quite clear that the cumulative IQ of the entire cast is 4. Lacey revealed herself to have the smarts of a sea sponge and the style sense of a color blind hooker. The editors took no mercy on her porous brain either, choosing not to edit out her inability to say “stalagmites.” Then, {Read More}

10 Things I Learned From Last Night’s “Bachelor In Paradise” Episode

bip

Bachelor in Paradise could easily be called People With a Very Loose Grip On Reality Go Spelunking. Although I’m still as drawn to the show as Kim Kardashian is to ass selfies, I feel as though it needs to tread lightly here. As people start to couple up and stick to their commitments, the show risks becoming a little bit boring for us regular folk. Do we really need to see our own ho-hum lives played out on national TV? {Read More}

One Mom Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest: My Summer Diary

gif_wine bottle

If you’ve been following my blog this summer, you know that my time at home with the boys has mostly sucked giant gorilla testicles. I was thinking about it, though, and it didn’t really start that way. I had a lot of hope, and then life happened. So I thought I’d share a little diary with you peeps on what has gone down at Hot Mess Headquarters. The summer started out as a juicy filet and ended up a giant {Read More}

Depression: The Autoimmune Disease Of the Mind

robin williams

I’ve seen so many great tributes to Robin Williams in the past 24 hours. I hope he knows how much he affected others in a positive way. That, despite his inner torment, the fact that he made people laugh was able to penetrate the immense sadness he must have felt and give him some sort of peace … even if only for a little while. In fact, peace is something those of us with depression rarely feel. I hate the {Read More}

10 Highlights From Last Night’s “Bachelor in Paradise” Premiere

Photo credit: Wetpaint Entertainment via Francisco Roman/ABC Television Group

The Bachelor in Paradise was as magical a train wreck as we all expected. Fake knockers, faux tans, and wife beaters led the way as folks coupled up faster than you could say, “STD”. One only has to hope that the salt water in Mexico kills sperm on contact. Otherwise, people will be getting knocked up by ocean proxy, and we do not need any little Chris Bukowskis running around. While the whole thing was positively captivating, I’ve shared 10 {Read More}

10 Things I Learned From The Bachelorette Men Tell All Episode

The Bachelorette

Photo credit: Wetpaint.com Holy hog balls, folks, that was one doozie of a “Men Tell All” episode. Man scarves and faux tans abounded but they left their hoodies at home. This is a special occasion after all. Considering I like Andi about as much as I like a scorching case of athlete’s foot, I was pleasantly surprised by that two hours of TV. Kudos, ABC. Kudos. In fact, I even learned quite a bit, and below I’ve shared 10 little {Read More}

PMS Is Real (P.S. We’re Out of Wine)

glass of wine

Warning: This post is NSFM (Not Safe For Men) Yesterday, the unthinkable happened in our house. My legendarily bad PMS collided with both of my boys’ worst behavior EVER to form an epic tsunami of parenting shit. It was the perfect storm. From the beginning of the day to the end, both boys were completely off. I knew things were going to go badly when I had to put my six-year-old in timeout in the morning, as he is usually {Read More}