9 Of the Worst Halloween Costumes For Kids

"Look, we forgot Halloween … again."

Due to my two boys being fickle, little a-holes, I found myself selling costumes on Craigslist this week, which left me scrambling for last minute costumes. I spent a good deal online because just the acronym “DIY” makes my ass twitch. What I found were a few cute ones mixed in with about a bazillion abominations, and I’ve included the worst offenders here: Walmart’s Batman Child Dress-Up Costume This costume screams, “My mother doesn’t love me.” Ot it could be {Read More}

Why “Don’t Be A Tattletale” No Longer Applies

Photo credit: Ingenesist Project

I have this strange habit of reading really depressing things that have nothing to do with me, especially when I get insomnia (which is far too often). I once got up in the middle of the night and read a bunch of stuff on a fellow blogger who had died and, sadly, decided that we would have been best friends … had she not gone and died on me. I often find myself reading random obituaries off Facebook. And sometimes {Read More}

5 Things I Wish They’d Change About Preschool

macaroni art

We’ve had our ups and downs with preschool. We started my first son in a two half-day program when he was only two, mostly because Mommy needed a break. Lo and behold, this school was in an old house in a charming area of a town near us. During the preschool orientation, candles were lit, the place looked quite clean, and Jack Johnson set the mellow mood from the CD player. I had my cup of coffee. It was fall. {Read More}

Why You Should Never Give Up On The Female Friendship

me_lori

A dear friend of mine recently informed me she was moving. Away. From me. The nerve! I kid, I kid, but there is no doubt the news hit me square in the feels, as this particular friend has done so much for me. She’s been there through thick and thin, and is someone I know I can rely on any and every second of the day. Any of you out there who has someone like this knows how good it {Read More}

I’m CE-Mother Fucking-O, Bitch!

me_blog wine

I have a confession to make, and I hate to admit this, as I don’t like to criticize other women. In fact, I’m very against all the bashing I see from women to other women on the many parenting blogs I visit. But here it is: I have been known to eye-roll when SAHMs list their occupation on Facebook as “CEO” of their household. I get that it’s supposed to be somewhat tongue in cheek but I can’t help but {Read More}

Parenting Is Like Folding a Fitted Sheet

snarkecard_fold fitted sheet

When I started this blog, I wanted it to be a place where I could make light of the heavy parts of parenting. Have a good laugh at it, you know? Maybe you’ve noticed lately that I haven’t posted much. To tell you the truth, I haven’t laughed much these days. You hear it all the damn time. PARENTING IS HARD . It’s such a simple statement that holds so much weight. When we say it, we’re not complaining as {Read More}

10 Reasons Moms Love Getting Their Hair “Did” More Than Sex

steelmagnolias_hair

Ladies – we love nothing more getting their our hair done, amirite? Honestly, if it came down to choosing between a spa day and two hours a the salon, I seriously would choose the latter. Not only do you look fab afterwards but it’s just so damn relaxing. Uninterrupted time with the latest issue of People? Uh, hell yes. I had an appointment last week and, as I sat there in my reverie, I realized that this is, indeed, better {Read More}

What People Don’t Tell You About Raising Sensitive Boys

Finn_dock Wisconsin

As parents of boys, we are often conditioned to think that our kids should have a thick skin. “Toughen up,” we say. “Don’t be a baby.” We have more tolerance for tears when they come from girls, as it’s just the way we’ve become accustomed to think. No one tells you what to do when you have a sensitive boy and, the more I talk to other moms of boys, the more I realize that there are plenty out there. {Read More}

Bachelor In Paradise Penultimate Episode: Stupidity Runs Rampant

I've got this.

It’s hard to look for a theme on BIP each week other than blatant debauchery and ridonkulous drama but this week’s theme bitch-slapped me silly. It’s become quite clear that the cumulative IQ of the entire cast is 4. Lacey revealed herself to have the smarts of a sea sponge and the style sense of a color blind hooker. The editors took no mercy on her porous brain either, choosing not to edit out her inability to say “stalagmites.” Then, {Read More}

10 Things I Learned From Last Night’s “Bachelor In Paradise” Episode

bip

Bachelor in Paradise could easily be called People With a Very Loose Grip On Reality Go Spelunking. Although I’m still as drawn to the show as Kim Kardashian is to ass selfies, I feel as though it needs to tread lightly here. As people start to couple up and stick to their commitments, the show risks becoming a little bit boring for us regular folk. Do we really need to see our own ho-hum lives played out on national TV? {Read More}