The Bachelorette Hometown Dates: Weenies Around the Horn!

Desiree Hartsock

The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, which is why the week of the hometown dates on The Bachelorette makes me happier than Al Sharpton on a media blitz. The guys this year are certainly not bad looking but they also could each be man-gina models. I’ll share a few of my thoughts on the visits: Zak: Oh, Zak, Zak, Zak, Zacky boy. The sacrificial lamb. The one who gets chosen because the girl already knows she’s in love {Read More}

The Occasional Sunshine Of The Unspotless Mind

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

Lately I’ve gone from playing “Words With Friends” to playing “Words With Fellow Insomniacs”. The ping goes out at 2 a.m. and, if I get a reply, I usually think, “Oh, you’re like me. No sleep, huh?” There are people who have occasional bouts but then there are the lifers, like me. I do have runs of decent sleep but, overall, I suffer from Monkey Brain. If I get up to pee, grab a glass of water, or even roll {Read More}

I Used to Walk to School Uphill Both Ways (And It Was Fun)

grandma techology

I have a feeling I’m going to get a lot of shit for this one, but I’m prepared. It’s about longing for the days of old, when we didn’t know what “GMO,” pink slime, or gluten meant, or that white bread causes cancer. Yes, I long to be ignorant, as ignorance is bliss. I heard that once. I know all you Whole Foods shoppers will be driving down my street, all sneaky-like in your oh-so-quiet Priuses, waiting for the perfect {Read More}

The Bachelorette Takes Barcelona: Eh, Who Cares

des_james

In the words of Pink Floyd, “Is there anybody out there?” Echo, echo, echo. No one seems to be reading the Bachelorette posts this year, but that’s never stopped me before. I’ll keep this shiz to a minimum. Some random thoughts on last night’s episode: Enough with the hoodies already. If I see them again, I’ll sick George Zimmerman on your ass. He HATES hoodies. Too soon? When Des was describing her perfect man, did she tell ABC producers “Heavy {Read More}